As I lay dying (from boredom)

Sports Injury + Pain = Surgery => Complete bed rest => Profound boredom. I cant take it anymore. Iam awfully bored. I havent done anything productive for the last 2 months and 2 months is a very very long time. Iam so bored that I just googled "Iam bored". I need help. Professional help. I need a shrink. Iam going to die from this most awful mental illness named BOREDOM.

As I lay dying,

I, Ms. wREck, a resident of Mumbai, Maharashtra, hereby make this fake Will and revoke all prior Wills and Codicils.

I leave all my precious books except for The Edge of Reasons to my sis. Iam taking 'The Edge Of Reasons' to the grave... That book is hilarious :)) Iam not ready to part with it, not even after my death...lol. My clothes are to be equally distributed amongst Pearl and Amy. They are gonna love me for this ;) I leave my imaginary sea-view apartment in South Bombay to my parents...LOL. On a serious note, what do I leave them? ohhh yes, I leave them some peace of mind :)) I expect my parents to take care of my medals and trophies. The autograph of Brett Lee is inside the book Edge of Reasons so thats going with me. The autograph of all other sportstars may be distributed amongst Ryan and AJ. Binga and Warnie will go to my niece... and Go, you better take care of Binga, he is my Jaan. The DVD of Dostaana goes to Payroll Queen so that she can ogle John Abraham's body and grin. Other DVDs will go to my sister. I leave the contact details (of all the good looking guys ) programmed to my cell phone to Payroll Queen . My laptop, mp3 player, cell phone and all other gadgets may go to anyone who wants them. My diaries are to be burnt and only Ruch may be allowed to read my diary before burning them so that after reading all the crap in it, she can laugh her ass off and call me a loser a million times. I also leave her my collection of sunnies, books on GMAT/TOEFL/IELTS and all those study abroad brochures. My Nike Shoes to no one.... I will wear them in the grave. All my accessories and make up things to my sis. I leave all my branded sports jerseys to T Shot aka Teddy Bear. My money in the bank to any elders home (that is if I havent already spent it). And if you guys need anything, then lemme know. I will go shopping and leave them to you :D

And I think I really need a shrink.